I’d start passing out some crying towels to the Libs and other Obama supporters, except that I enjoy their weeping so much I can’t bear to ruin the ride for myself.  I’m going to assist everyone in determining the result of last night’s stunning debut for Sarah Palin…and the fear that is now shuddering through Barack Obama’s campaign.  Here’s a little “how to read the lay of the land” primer.

First, you have to almost eliminate the lightweights entirely.  This includes all the blowhards who post COMMENTS on blog posts, news stories, etc.  They tend to puff up and spew, and ordinarily you can read something from their confidence.  In this case you can’t because the Obama camp is doing a pretty good job of keeping those rank-and-file mushrooms in the dark and on a steady diet of bullshit.  Those people still think they’re ahead, and that’s actually awesome.  The more of these morons who think their guy has this wrapped up, the fewer of them will bother to get up from their Playstation long enough to vote.  These are the true lightweights–of the “blogosphere” and life in general–and bothering with them is just a colossal waste of time and energy.

That leaves basically three groups whose temperatures you should probably take.  The first of these is the pseudo-professional blog community.  These are the folks who somehow get featured on websites like The Huffington Post and others; these people are the furthest thing from true professional journalists (and wouldn’t know what “professional” means because they have no morals or dignity, something the trade once demanded of it’s participants) but they pose as pros and are unfortunately sometimes treated that way.  Reading the lay of the land with these people is easy–if you see gaiety, cameraderie and primarily praise for their candidate, things are probably going pretty well for them.  It’s tough to discern the difference between this type of euphoria and wreckless overconfidence, but you’ll get the hang of it with practice.  Overconfidence is good–we had a lot of that a couple of days ago, and it’s a telling sign too–but it’s not the sign we’re seeing now.  Next, look for condescending arrogance.  If you’re not sure what that looks like, read my posts for the last few hours–that attitude is my trademark.  The difference between me (and most Conservatives) versus the Lib bloggers is that our condescension erupts from deep within, from an area of certainty–ABSOLUTE CERTAINTY–that we’re RIGHT.  This is a well from which Liberals can NEVER draw because even the biggest idiot in the bunch knows deep down that s/he’s completely full of shit.  Condescending arrogance from a liberal blogger (and some in the maintstream media, like Keith Olbermann) is a SURE sign of nervousness.  It’s a defense mechanism for the hopelessly lost where they turn to weak “intellectualism” or some other mask in order to hide their inherent inferiority.  When you see a “bring it on” attitude from one of these losers, you know your race is won.  The pseudo-professional blogosphere is chock full of Left-wing condescending arrogance today.

The next group is members of the professional media.  These people are also arrogant and treacherous, but they’re not ordinarily stupid–at least not completely.  This group will grudgingly admit when things have turned, and they’re NOTORIOUS turncoats who will blow with the winds of popularity almost as freely as Bill Clinton.  If the tide is truly turning, you’ll know it because these people will be wearing their change of heart like a badge of honor (instead of the mark of cowardice that it truly is).  If you see phrases like “I hate to say it, but…” or “I stand corrected” or “In a remarkable turnaround”, you know the professional media person in question has begun to bring the ship about.  This is the most dangerous thing a media-supported candidate can see–and Barack Obama has ships turning about all around him today.  Take a quick look across the internet right now and where you were seeing words like “lightweight” and “long-shot” and “hail mary” two days ago, you’re getting “natural” and “commodity” and “breath of fresh air” today.  “A star is born” is a common refrain today…but it would be just as accurate to say “a star has faded” with regard to Barack Obama–and given another day or two, that will be the next news cycle headline, mark my words.

The last group to keep an eye on is the candidate and his handlers themselves.  If you see a shift that isn’t subtle–either in message, in strategy, in activity, almost anywhere–you KNOW something really, REALLY bad has happened.  I want you to spend a few moments today examining Obama’s campaign rhetoric of yesterday (and this past weekend) with what is being offered up today and in the next few days.  See if you can spot any change in message, tone, activity that is obvious.  Subtle changes don’t really count, but apparent ones do.  When you spot the alterations–and you will–I would respectfully ask that you have a nice supply of crying towels available.  Remember that these poor deluded fools who call themselves Democrats are still Americans, after all, and they’re going to need our full support as fellow countrymen and women.  They’re going to need a hug.

Just not yet.  I want to revel in this a bit longer, k?